BarryM17 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 As I usually do on weekends - another giveaway. As mentioned before, I love to laugh. I found the last giveaway thread to be absolutely hilarious and at times I was honestly in tears. @Hellen proposed 2 ideas. Unclear as to which one to go with, so both options are available. 1.) Craziest work story. 2.) Weirdest “this one time I was intoxicated” story. Please be honest and do not make stuff up. I'm interested in user's real life experiences, just like I'm interested in real world use cases for XRP. The post that makes me laugh the most wins. Deadline for entry ends Monday, 9/3/18 at 11:59 PM, US Eastern time. Payment will be made the following morning. Users participating must be registered on this forum prior to 8/31/18. Unlimited entries. DariStar, ImTheRippler and Delectro 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zenkert Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 (edited) 1. Craziest work story. 10 years ago I was was working in a firm that had a excellent programmer, a one of a kind. Not only was he an excellent programmer, he also had a great social interface. Many programmers does not. So he fell in love with a co-worker. They married and had children. All was well. Except this. At work - he was so focused on results and sometimes lost track of where he was. At the toilet - having a sh.... with the door unlocked. Found him there numerous times looking at him sitting down, and he just was , , , what??? Looking at me. Why you here? Edited August 31, 2018 by zenkert ImTheRippler and ImpulseCorn 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lak5h Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 2) Weirdest “this one time I was intoxicated” story Every time me and friends do shrooms together and are walking around outside we encounter a groundhog. I'd never ever seen a groundhog before in my life until the first time I did shrooms with my friends. Now every single time we have a "day out" we encounter a groundhog, no matter what city we're in and no matter what park or forest we walk through. Those are the only times I ever seen groundhogs. Never sober. Do groundhogs actually exist? zenkert, Flintstone, ImTheRippler and 2 others 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 I have both to share, 1) I had my own business so I guess it fits in work story, My play station 2 memory card was stolen which had too much data on it and all the unlocked players of Tekken 5, WE7, Smack down, etc etc etc(list is too long) basically it had 1000's of hours of game play saved. I had two of them but I was running a game parlor so it had a lot of customers saved data and it meant loss of business as they won't be able to continue their saved games. Being a gamer myself I could relate and understand. After sulking for a while and cursing the thief(I had an idea who stole it, first time customer on a late night) I order a new one, this wholesale guy where I use to get my stuff said he is not getting any new supply but he has a used one, I ordered it anyways. Surprise, surprise, as soon as I started Tekken 5 I realised everything was unlocked, checked couple others and realised it was my own memory card, told my wholesaler and he said it was used and someone sold it to him. Asked me to call him if the scoundrel comes back. He did, after a week, I got out to give my wholesaler a call and filling him in the details how we would handle it. It would have been 5-7 minutes call, when I came back, all my 3 Play stations were gone, stolen by the same guy, I was numb, it was a great blow, I was just 17 at the time, didn't have such experiences before. "Apologies the story got a bit long but I'm trying to keep it as succinct as possible" My wholesaler gave me 2 PS on loan so my business wouldn't suffer, two days later, I get a call from my wholesaler to reach his place ASAP, the thief tried to sell my Play stations to my guy only ? I was so relieved and had a meal finally after those depressing two days. 2) I used to enjoy the hash once in a month or so when a customer would come from Himachal(North India) and will bring some Malana cream(one of the best hash in world). I used to savor it after couple of drinks, this one time I had too much to drink and the guy came with chillum(cone shaped pipe) and some Malana hash, I never tried chillum before, only few puffs from a joint. I was blacked out, didn't know how I reach home, my last memory was smoking it and lying on the floor, when I woke up I was next to my wife, she was very pleasant to my surprise. I didn't have courage to ask her what happened as I was trying to recall the happenings from last night. Turns out we had the best sex ever and she loved the roses and chocolate I bought her last night. To this day I don't know what happened that night, how I came home or bought stuff, or how the fcuk I had sex with my wife which turned out to be the best one I loved this topic and wanted to share, really don't care about the giveaway, I do have like 100's of crazy stories, I'm one of those guys you see in movies who has all the crazy stuff going on with his life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flintstone Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 Oh, ffs Bazza! I’ll wait a bit before I post my No.2. Here it is in emoji’s ? ??????????????????♂️☀️??????♂️??♀️?9️⃣9️⃣9️⃣??♂️??????????? Trickery and DariStar 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DariStar Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 2.) Weirdest “this one time I was intoxicated” story. In this case I pretty much could use every weekend of mine but this one time in 2012 when I turned 18 everybody was talking about the end of the world predicted by Mayan calender, and I thought it was great time to make The End of The World Party. December 21st of 2012 I invited around 20 people to my brand new rented apartment and they were the closest to people to me mostly friends and family members. I was ready to welcome everybody of them with 1gram of lemon haze 1 ninja turtle (120mg MDMA) and of course half a liter of the finest polish 40% vodka. But for my surprise over 150 people showed up which most of 'em I obviously didnt even recognise because they were over 20 and 30 and only I had some connections with friends of the "friends". And I was kinda worried they will demolish my place (as it usually happens) but for my surprise most of them brought their own goodies and they were the most polite people I have ever party with. Even when the police showed up to quiet us down at 4-5AM everybody started cleaning my apartment and quielty leaving and only few of the closest friends staying over. It was the wildest and the most organised party I have ever been at even tho most of those 100 people were total strangers to me and it was only planned for no more than 25 people. I would never expected that from people I dont know cause I know how some times I can be when I crash to some strangers 'party The End Sorry for all the gramma and spelling errors but it's already friday night and I'm way over intoxicated... I could also tell you about my resent holidays and how I crashed some wedding party in Mallorca xD BarryM17 and Flintstone 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarryM17 Posted August 31, 2018 Author Share Posted August 31, 2018 29 minutes ago, Invincible said: I have both to share, 1) I had my own business so I guess it fits in work story, My play station 2 memory card was stolen which had too much data on it and all the unlocked players of Tekken 5, WE7, Smack down, etc etc etc(list is too long) basically it had 1000's of hours of game play saved. I had two of them but I was running a game parlor so it had a lot of customers saved data and it meant loss of business as they won't be able to continue their saved games. Being a gamer myself I could relate and understand. After sulking for a while and cursing the thief(I had an idea who stole it, first time customer on a late night) I order a new one, this wholesale guy where I use to get my stuff said he is not getting any new supply but he has a used one, I ordered it anyways. Surprise, surprise, as soon as I started Tekken 5 I realised everything was unlocked, checked couple others and realised it was my own memory card, told my wholesaler and he said it was used and someone sold it to him. Asked me to call him if the scoundrel comes back. He did, after a week, I got out to give my wholesaler a call and filling him in the details how we would handle it. It would have been 5-7 minutes call, when I came back, all my 3 Play stations were gone, stolen by the same guy, I was numb, it was a great blow, I was just 17 at the time, didn't have such experiences before. "Apologies the story got a bit long but I'm trying to keep it as succinct as possible" My wholesaler gave me 2 PS on loan so my business wouldn't suffer, two days later, I get a call from my wholesaler to reach his place ASAP, the thief tried to sell my Play stations to my guy only ? I was so relieved and had a meal finally after those depressing two days. 2) I used to enjoy the hash once in a month or so when a customer would come from Himachal(North India) and will bring some Malana cream(one of the best hash in world). I used to savor it after couple of drinks, this one time I had too much to drink and the guy came with chillum(cone shaped pipe) and some Malana hash, I never tried chillum before, only few puffs from a joint. I was blacked out, didn't know how I reach home, my last memory was smoking it and lying on the floor, when I woke up I was next to my wife, she was very pleasant to my surprise. I didn't have courage to ask her what happened as I was trying to recall the happenings from last night. Turns out we had the best sex ever and she loved the roses and chocolate I bought her last night. To this day I don't know what happened that night, how I came home or bought stuff, or how the fcuk I had sex with my wife which turned out to be the best one I loved this topic and wanted to share, really don't care about the giveaway, I do have like 100's of crazy stories, I'm one of those guys you see in movies who has all the crazy stuff going on with his life. Hilarious. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Babelly Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 2) Cut right to the chase. Had a sh*tty day at work so I went to the local watering hole with the intention of having a "few" drinks. Ended up getting absolutely blacked out. Went home with some chick that was no better then a soft 6. Barely remember doing the deed. Fell asleep with the condom on after. Woke up and i guess i had been ******* myself the whole night with the condom on. Condom filled up like a water balloon when I awoke in the morning. Tied the condom off like a water balloon and threw it in her bathroom garbage still inflated. It was only Thursday so I went back to work in the same clothes as night prior. Always wear protection friends. The end. BarryM17 and Flintstone 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarryM17 Posted August 31, 2018 Author Share Posted August 31, 2018 24 minutes ago, DariStar said: 2.) Weirdest “this one time I was intoxicated” story. In this case I pretty much could use every weekend of mine but this one time in 2012 when I turned 18 everybody was talking about the end of the world predicted by Mayan calender, and I thought it was great time to make The End of The World Party. December 21st of 2012 I invited around 20 people to my brand new rented apartment and they were the closest to people to me mostly friends and family members. I was ready to welcome everybody of them with 1gram of lemon haze 1 ninja turtle (120mg MDMA) and of course half a liter of the finest polish 40% vodka. But for my surprise over 150 people showed up which most of 'em I obviously didnt even recognise because they were over 20 and 30 and only I had some connections with friends of the "friends". And I was kinda worried they will demolish my place (as it usually happens) but for my surprise most of them brought their own goodies and they were the most polite people I have ever party with. Even when the police showed up to quiet us down at 4-5AM everybody started cleaning my apartment and quielty leaving and only few of the closest friends staying over. It was the wildest and the most organised party I have ever been at even tho most of those 100 people were total strangers to me and it was only planned for no more than 25 people. I would never expected that from people I dont know cause I know how some times I can be when I crash to some strangers 'party The End Sorry for all the gramma and spelling errors but it's already friday night and I'm way over intoxicated... I could also tell you about my resent holidays and how I crashed some wedding party in Mallorca xD Thank you. And again, A MILLION thanks to you for the "Buy the dip" clip. Priceless. I've watched it like 10 times and have re-posted it (giving you credit of course). My submission - which doesn't count - just sharing, and which I've once posted in the Fan Submissions section, is below. "@WillIAMRich, I will vote for you in the poll. First of all, good story, even if it's all fiction. Secondly, it's hard to believe it's all fiction, as I've only tripped on LSD once in my life but so many of the things you said resonated with my experience. First I took 1 tab. 30 minutes pass by and I feel nothing, so I take a 2nd tab. My friends warn me against this. We're at an after-hours club in Hawaii where they play house music. 15 minutes after taking the 2nd tab I go to the bathroom. I feel intense heat behind me. I turn around and the bathroom is on fire. I run out into the club, ***** hanging out, shouting "the bathroom is on fire!" I sit down at a 3-inch thick marble table with my friend. We both can see each other's hands and whatnot through the table. I'd be like "how many fingers am I holding up?," and he'd give the correct answer. I become dehydrated. I bought like 30 bottles of water but every time a tiny black devil with horns would steal my bottle. There were dozens of them just running around the wall carrying my water bottles. A song by Josh Wink - A Higher State of Consciousness repeats over and over and over and over. I lay my head down on the table, not feeling so well. I descend into a whirlpool of fire, which I was in for 30 years. We leave the club. It's daylight. As soon as I see the daylight I feel better. Then we get into my friends car to drive back to the Army barracks. We pass the same road sign hundreds of times in a row. I can see the mountains in the distance, but we never get any closer. It took us 3 years to make that 15-minute drive to the barracks. All my friends faces were transforming into terrible beasts, scaring the crap out of me. Once home, I just sat there, eating Juicy Fruit gum and drinking orange juice and staring at my friends face, watching him transform into different monsters. That Josh Wink song - I couldn't get it out of my head - it literally was on repeat for the next 3 months of my life. I had flashbacks for the next 3 years. I also said, "totally never again," which I've held true to. So anyhow, you have my vote!" ImTheRippler, Flintstone and DariStar 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Triple Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 (edited) My craziest intoxicated story: After getting incredibly hammered on my 21st birthday, I had obligations to travel back from the city I was in back to where I was living at the time early the next morning. I don't have a car, so I was planning on taking the train the next morning and when I awakened I was still fairly wasted, and incredibly hung over. I had the spins pretty bad all the way to the train station, and when I finally arrived I was too disoriented to realise that I had been standing on the wrong side of the train track until my train pulled up to the other side of the station. An elderly lady and I had been talking for some time regarding not knowing which side of the station to stand and reflexively, as the train pulled up, I quickly ran across the tracks and hopped up the ledge on the other side. I looked back, remembering the older lady who had been waiting for the same train as I, and it was at that moment that I realised that she was holding a walker. We made eye contact and she began to walk onto the tracks. This was a slow process and as she got closer to the other side it slowly began to occur to me that there was no way for her to make it across in time, and that the train would likely begin to leave with her still on the tracks. I turned to the train, hoping to see an attendant to inform of the situation. However there was not, and as soon as I turned to the train, it closed it's doors and began moving forward. I then instantly turned to the elderly lady who was at that point DIRECTLY in front of the train, in the middle of the tracks, clutching her walker. The train then began to pull her underneath it's depths, at first grabbing the walker from her hands, tearing it to shreds in front of my eyes. I began screaming for help, but my cries fell upon deaf ears as the train continued to plow directly over her. The train finally passed over her position and revealed her, laying on her back with pieces of the walker scattered about. Time stood still as I saw that her eyes were closed, believing that this woman had just died in front of me. However, I then noticed that she was still breathing. I ran down and talked with her, assessing the situation and called 911 as per her request. Miraculously, she walked out of the situation with no bleeding wounds, missing limbs, or visable broken bones. To my knowledge she only bumped her head when falling. Afterwriting this out I realised that you were looking for something "funny", so I understand that this might not win the contest. (unless you've got a twisted sense of humor) ? Edited August 31, 2018 by Triple Flintstone 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DariStar Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 (edited) May 2018 I was on holidays in Mallorca, I was there for 7 days in 4 star hotel with the most beautiful view and all inclusive (cause we all know all inclusive is the most important thing when you book your hotels) I have managed to make the best relationships with security gaurds so I was the one one who had access to booze after closing hours but how I went with one of them to brothel without knowing spanish language is another story this time I'll tell you how I crashed some wedding party. On my last night of holidays when I was already super intoxicated and pretty much partied with everyone at the hotel I went to bed but I coundn't fall asleep because somebody outside was playing music too loud. Because I was "little" bit too drunk I thought I will go there where the music is coming from and tell 'em to turn it down a little bit, but as soon as I have walked out of my hotel room I met one of the mates I was driving before and he was complaing how he couldnt get any alcohol at 1AM so I told him I had some connections and in less than a minute we walked out of dining area with full glasses of Mallorca's beers (I'm not a big fun of beers but those spanish beers are really good) we set down and talk about economics and how to run a business before he went to his room and I was back to a mission to "turn the music little bit down". After walking around for 15 minutes towards that music was coming from I have managed to walked into the most bueatiful villa in the forest where everybody was so drunk they didn't even noticed I wasn't from the wedding and as soon as I have arrived they stared making me my favourite drinks (vodka with orange juice 50/50) so I didn't tell 'em to turn the music down but up and we have partied till the sunrise I managed to dance with bride and had great time even tho there was language barrier but at around 6AM I realised it was time for me to go becasue I was supposed to leave my hotel room at 10AM and I had plane taking me back home at 2PM. For my surprise Mallorca in May is very empty at night and when I was walking back to my hotel room I didnt see one soul but I cant really tell beceause I remember only half way home before my film cutted off (maybe because they gave me few drinks on the way back xD). I woke up at 9:50AM only 10 minutes before I was suppose to leave with some girl sleeping right next to me and bunch of broken booze on the floor so I left my room with 100 euro on the bed in hurry super hungover barely making it to the airport. xD I dont think I will ever find out how this girl and that booze got to my room but the spanish wedding was mad! Edited August 31, 2018 by DariStar BarryM17 and Flintstone 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 (edited) 3 hours ago, BarryM17 said: As I usually do on weekends - another giveaway. As mentioned before, I love to laugh. I found the last giveaway thread to be absolutely hilarious and at times I was honestly in tears. @Hellen proposed 2 ideas. Unclear as to which one to go with, so both options are available. 1.) Craziest work story. 2.) Weirdest “this one time I was intoxicated” story. Please be honest and do not make stuff up. I'm interested in user's real life experiences, just like I'm interested in real world use cases for XRP. The post that makes me laugh the most wins. Deadline for entry ends Monday, 9/3/18 at 11:59 PM, US Eastern time. Payment will be made the following morning. Users participating must be registered on this forum prior to 8/31/18. Unlimited entries. 1. Craziest work story: As an 88m(truckdriver) in the Army (2012) we were sent out to Ft. Hunter-Liggett in CA to cross-train with another unit on a different style of truck. Turns out that the second unit never showed for training, so the entire month we spent in 100f+ weather hiking throughout the mountains during the day when there was nothing to do, and back at the camp we rigged the Semi-batteries of our trucks to surge-protectors so we could charge our phones. The third week there, the Conex holding all of our personal gear finally decided to arrive after there after us (which we only had 1-2 uniforms on us, and no way to shower) and during the unloading procedure of our trailer; another Conex was being lifted up by a CHU (Container handling unit) that malfunctioned and suddenly dropped on another Sgt from a different platoon. Was honestly a bit striking as to how fragile all of our lives are. 2. This one time I was intoxicated (at #Gridlife), and people had packed their tents next to eachother like sardines just to have enough space for everybody. So literally every 4-5 ft you'd have a different party to stumble upon. I remember making my way back from the concert stage, and I stopped by one party-tent that had beer pong. Out of nowhere, the biggest Chad you'd ever meet ran up and chest bumped me, pointed at me with beers in both hands and yelled "BROOO YOUR MY DAD!" before running off to chestbump the next guy and do the same thing. I also ran into a large Bender cosplay there, it was a good costume. Got some pics taken with him too. Edited August 31, 2018 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarryM17 Posted August 31, 2018 Author Share Posted August 31, 2018 1 hour ago, Babelly said: 2) Cut right to the chase. Had a sh*tty day at work so I went to the local watering hole with the intention of having a "few" drinks. Ended up getting absolutely blacked out. Went home with some chick that was no better then a soft 6. Barely remember doing the deed. Fell asleep with the condom on after. Woke up and i guess i had been ******* myself the whole night with the condom on. Condom filled up like a water balloon when I awoke in the morning. Tied the condom off like a water balloon and threw it in her bathroom garbage still inflated. It was only Thursday so I went back to work in the same clothes as night prior. Always wear protection friends. The end. LMFAO! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarryM17 Posted August 31, 2018 Author Share Posted August 31, 2018 1 hour ago, Triple said: My craziest intoxicated story: After getting incredibly hammered on my 21st birthday, I had obligations to travel back from the city I was in back to where I was living at the time early the next morning. I don't have a car, so I was planning on taking the train the next morning and when I awakened I was still fairly wasted, and incredibly hung over. I had the spins pretty bad all the way to the train station, and when I finally arrived I was too disoriented to realise that I had been standing on the wrong side of the train track until my train pulled up to the other side of the station. An elderly lady and I had been talking for some time regarding not knowing which side of the station to stand and reflexively, as the train pulled up, I quickly ran across the tracks and hopped up the ledge on the other side. I looked back, remembering the older lady who had been waiting for the same train as I, and it was at that moment that I realised that she was holding a walker. We made eye contact and she began to walk onto the tracks. This was a slow process and as she got closer to the other side it slowly began to occur to me that there was no way for her to make it across in time, and that the train would likely begin to leave with her still on the tracks. I turned to the train, hoping to see an attendant to inform of the situation. However there was not, and as soon as I turned to the train, it closed it's doors and began moving forward. I then instantly turned to the elderly lady who was at that point DIRECTLY in front of the train, in the middle of the tracks, clutching her walker. The train then began to pull her underneath it's depths, at first grabbing the walker from her hands, tearing it to shreds in front of my eyes. I began screaming for help, but my cries fell upon deaf ears as the train continued to plow directly over her. The train finally passed over her position and revealed her, laying on her back with pieces of the walker scattered about. Time stood still as I saw that her eyes were closed, believing that this woman had just died in front of me. However, I then noticed that she was still breathing. I ran down and talked with her, assessing the situation and called 911 as per her request. Miraculously, she walked out of the situation with no bleeding wounds, missing limbs, or visable broken bones. To my knowledge she only bumped her head when falling. Afterwriting this out I realised that you were looking for something "funny", so I understand that this might not win the contest. (unless you've got a twisted sense of humor) ? You won't win for this post, though it had me going at first and I was laughing, but then it turned like really serious, and the humor was lost. None-the-less, interesting story - thank you. Plus unlimited entries, so nothing is over yet. Triple 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarryM17 Posted August 31, 2018 Author Share Posted August 31, 2018 31 minutes ago, Mr_McFearson said: 2. This one time I was intoxicated (at #Gridlife), and people had packed their tents next to eachother like sardines just to have enough space for everybody. So literally every 4-5 ft you'd have a different party to stumble upon. I remember making my way back from the concert stage, and I stopped by one party-tent that had beer pong. Out of nowhere, the biggest Chad you'd ever meet ran up and chest bumped me, pointed at me with beers in both hands and yelled "BROOO YOUR MY DAD!" before running off to chestbump the next guy and do the same thing. I also ran into a large Bender cosplay there, it was a good costume. Got some pics taken with him too. LOL. This reminds me of my time doing AIT in Ft. Gordon, GA. There was a Shoney's - I know it's mostly recognized as a restaurant, but where I was stationed Shoney's had a hotel/motel complex, set up in like a square position. Picture four rows of buildings, assembled in a square, with a central parking area in between the four buildings. Every weekend all of us would book up the entire hotel and have crazy parties. Everyone would leave their room doors open for the entire weekend, and everyone had the bathtubs in their rooms filled with ice and full with beer. Everyone was always free to go into anyone's room at any time and grab a beer, or chat, or have sex. Probably the most fun I've had in a 4-month period of my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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